The Maker of all human beings (ALLAH) is
recalling all units manufactured, regardless of
make or year, due to a serious defect that has developed in the
primary and central component of the heart.
This is due to a malfunction in the original
prototype units code named Adam and Eve,
resulting in the reproduction of the same defect
in all subsequent units. This defect has been
identified as “Subsequential Internal Non-
morality,” more commonly known as S.I.N., as
it is primarily expressed.
Some of the symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at
fault for this defect, is providing factory-
authorized repair and service free of charge
to correct this defect. ALLAH has most generously offered to bear
the entire burden of the staggering cost of
these repairs. There is no additional fee
required.The number to call for repair in all
areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected,
please upload your burden of SIN through
the REPENTANCE procedure. Next,
download ATONEMENT from ALLAH into the heart component.
No matter how big or small the SIN defect is,
ALLAH will replace it with:
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the QURAN
(BEST Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for
further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the
human being unit without correction voids
any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit
to dangers and problems too numerous to list,
and will result in the human unit being
permanently impounded. For free emergency
service, call on ALLAH.
DANGER: The human being units not
responding to this recall action will have to be
scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not
be permitted to enter Heaven so as to
prevent contamination of that facility.
Thank you for your attention!
P.S. Please assist where possible by notifying
others of this important recall notice, and you
may contact ALLAH any time.
Because HE Lives!
Working for God on earth doesn’t pay much…
but His retirement plan is out of this world!